Thursday, January 20, 2011

Need to take NEW approach!!



Well, the gremlins had their second swim lesson today.  I guess there is good and bad news.. /sigh/  The last swim lesson Luna did great and was in the water paddling and kicking, but Star was NOT feeling it.  She kept crying for me (I was sitting on the bleachers on the opposite side of the pool), and even when I went over to them and sat right by her, she refused to go in.  I figured this time, I'd just leave the pool area entirely and just watch from the lobby (there is a window upstairs that looks onto the pool).  I was a little surprised, since they are both usually really excited about going into the water.  I did observe though that everything was fine up until her sister got comfortable with the instructor and her usual happy outgoing self.. As soon as that happened Luna just retracted into her shy shell.. The more Luna came out, the further Star sunk in.. /sigh/ 

I figured maybe it's the acoustics of an indoor pool (there's an aquatics aerobics class going on at the same time, and maybe the noise was too much), maybe the new environment, the new person, maybe it was just too much for her to rake in.  So, today,  I showed up a half hour early and sat with them on the bleachers and we watched the class before them, I talked to them about swimming, about going in the water, etc.  and they BOTH seemed really excited.  When their turn came, I said my good byes and headed upstairs.  Everything seemed to be going just fine until the third student showed up, and Luna looked up and saw me at the window.. Then the waterworks and screaming commenced.  It took everything I had inside of me NOT to go running down and grab my little gremlin and kiss and hug her, but I stood my ground.  I figured if I did that it'd just signal to her that every time she screamed I'd come running, and that is probably NOT a good thing..



So, I just hung out upstairs like a coward, peaking every so often at my screaming toddler.
I FINALLY went down 5 minutes before the class was over, and procured my two gremlins, a little sad that Star was NOT cooperating, but totally understanding..
The instructor then advised me that if she does not start participating she will recommend I try a mommy and me class.. All good, (been down THAT road before) except... Luna will be fine remaining in her class by herself, I can just entertain Star for that 1/2 hour, BUT who will watch and entertain Luna while I'm In the pool with her sister?  We've faced THIS dilemma before, and THAT is why we haven't had classes before now.  /sigh/ 
Well, it looks like I'm going to have to try something ELSE.  They have family swim every evening from 1830-1930 (which will wreak HAVOC on our dinner and sleep schedule but I DO realize it's NOT every night and NOT permanent, so we MAY just have to suck it up) so, we may have to take advantage of this and maybe help get Star used to the indoor pool and her surroundings a little with me and daddy, people she's accustomed to.  Another thing I'm going to try is different classes for both of them, maybe being separated might help.  The classes were canceled due to inclement weather last week and we need to reschedule a MAKEUP class, and I just may schedule them at different times/days, and see if this makes a difference...

Wish us luck...

Have any of YOU faced this dilemma? Any advice? Ideas?

Sincerely,

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10 comments:

  1. I think you should try the makeup classes on different days. It's only one time and you'll be able to see if that works for Star.

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  2. So, I have twins (a boy and a girl 4 years old) My girl is more of the shy one typically and my son is mr. social. HOWEVER, when in social situations and my daughter gets comfortable and no longer wants or needs to be right next to her brother, my son gets really shy, whiny and starts asking for me. So, I have done my best to have play dates for them separately (which is hard at times) and in different groups as much as possible. Since I've been doing that, they are more capable at handling social and new situations by themselves...hope that helps.

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  3. Well, let me first say that I commend you on holding your ground when your daughter was crying for you. I think that's an important part of development. Also, I'd like to give you kudos for planning the rest of your schedule around something you think might be great for your girls and not throwing in the towel.

    You know what you did? What I keep trying to get everyone i know to do? Stop making excuses for not doing something you really want to do. You saw what you wanted for your girls and went for it by making room for it in your life and putting off other things that aren't so important to you. I think that if you can do this, you can do whatever you put your heart into. Oh and good luck!

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  4. I could barely manage my one little boy in swimming -i give you HUGE KUDOS with two! We just had a struggle with soccer...so I figured off to find the next adventure -it will feel so good once she finds something she connects with and enjoys..and maybe the swimming will be something one on one the two of you can do? Or maybe it's a phase.. the joys of mother hood!!! haha! I love how unpredictable children are! ;) I'm following oyu via THursdays Blog Hop :)

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  5. Your daughters are so adorable. I can't wait to have one of my own :)

    I'm a new GFC follower. I came across your blog on the Thursday Blog Hop. It was too late to add my link :(

    I would love if you followed me back! Check out my savings blog! http://www.schmoobleesaves.com

    Thanks, look forward to your posts.

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  6. 'm happy to be your newest follower from the blog hop on GFC & Networked Blogs! Liked you on FB too. Your girls are gorgeous! Please come follow back & say Hi on my wall sometime too. :)

    http://BlessOthersWithCards.blogspot.com
    http://www.facebook.com/BlessOthersWithCards

    Lisa xoxo

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  7. I hope they like the new system :).

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  8. Your girls a re precious. I can't say I have been faced with this dilemma or even similar...sorry. Thanks for coming by my blog. I am now your newest follower.

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  9. Your girls are just adorable! Your newest follower!

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  10. I went thru something similar with my girls this summer. They took swimming classes (Mon-Thurs for 45 mins each morning at 2 weeks sessions)

    The first week was hard. They were scared and while there was no screaming and yelling - I did a lot of coaxing.

    I did see quite a few kids screaming and yelling and honestly it's common. I think you need to give it time. Don't quit on it!

    Try doing it together like you said - but it sounds to me based on what you shared that the problem is most likely that the situation and instructor are new. That is scary for a shy one! It means she will ahve to get comfortable with the situation and that can only happen with time & if you continue. I would explain that to the instructor as well - maybe she can be a bit more patient for a bit?

    Good luck mama! Stand strong - it's hard to see them cry for you like that (heartbreaking) but you are doing something that will benefit the girls in the long run!

    Bernadette
    http://momto2poshlildivas.blogspot.com

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