Friday, January 9, 2009

Aloha Friday #16

In Hawaii, Aloha Friday is the day to take it easy and look forward to the weekend. Kalani @ An Island Life is hosting Aloha Friday. What's that you ask? I’ll ask a simple question for you to answer. Nothing that requires a lengthy response. If you’d like to participate, just post your own question on your blog and leave your link at An Island Life. Don’t forget to visit the other participants! It’s a great way to make new bloggy friends!

Today’s question is:

What do you define as cheating?

I've been married for 13 years, and seen so many failed marriages, messed up relationships and known so many cheaters and cheatees...

There are so many valid points from all sides, but for me PERSONALLY? If you even fantasized about kissing, touching, etc... you've THOUGHT about cheating... to me that's just wrong... I wouldn't be drawing up the divorce papers over it, but don't let me find out... lol..
And a kiss? depends on the circumstances.. If he initiated it... OH HELL NO!!! If he reciprocated the intentions... OH HELL NO!!! I consider that cheating...

Sexual relations or not... hahahaha


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  1. Fantasizing should never be about someone you know personally. It could be a celebrity or a made-up character, never someone you know.

    Thinking about it is cheating. If you are thinking about kissing/having sex with say a person from your gym, it's cheating.

    Kisses are different. A peck on the cheek, not cheating. Full on tongue wash, cheating.

    Going online and having cybersex is definitely cheating. Same thing for porn. Unless you watch it with your significant other. If a person is using porn as a substitute or in place of their partner, it's cheating.

    Just my opinion.

  2. Hmmm, this is a tough question for me, having been cheated on. Fantasy is just that, I think the ACT is what is cheating. There is both emotional and physical cheating. Exchanging sexual emails, text messages or conversation with someone is cheating in my book as well.

  3. Anything that you makes you feel guilty is probably a form of cheating.

  4. Cheating to me is the actual act.

    I don't think thoughts and fantasizing are cheating.

    I don't know what I feel about Cyber Sex. I think I would count that as cheating because two real live people are interacting.

  5. I tend to agree with others that there are obvious items that are cheating. I do not think that fantasies would be grouped into this. However, if your significant other does not know that you are exchanging e-mails or participating in cyber sex with someone else I think it is 110% cheating. You are likely becoming emotionally attached at the same time.

  6. I agree with blueviolet, if it makes you feel guilty or you know it's wrong, then it is.

  7. The moment you've thought about it is the point you've begun to cheat. But thinking about it doesn't mean you have to act on it. Once you've thought about it is when you need to open communication lines and talk about it before it goes further.

    Good thoughts.

  8. I think entertaining thoughts over and over.. to me are a way of cheating.. it has to start somewhere right?

  9. I guess the question is emotional cheating vs. physical cheating. To me cheating is cheating either way.


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