Tuesday, September 30, 2008

I didn't tell


I got a lot of really interesting comments on the Aloha Friday question, and I thought I'd share my little story of why I asked.

Several years ago, Sam (now my husband) and I were stationed over seas. We returned from a deployment only to find evidence that one of his room mates had been using his bedroom for extra curricular activities. When confronted, Frank admitted to having an affair. Frank was dating my best friend at the time, Molly. Since Frank and Sam where best friends, I didn't want to cause any unnecessary waves, I struggled with this difficult position for quite some time.

I was confused, I know I'd like to know, I would feel betrayed if my friend didn't tell me, and on the other hand, it's not my place to say anything, I'd be betraying my other friend Frank. What to do? Well, I decided to play devils advocate, although I'd like her to tell me if the shoe was on the other foot, I figured I could trust Frank to confess and leave me out of it.

Several months later, I had even forgotten the entire incident, I see frank slouched over in a corner, and concerned, I ask him what was the matter. Frank explains to me that Molly confronted him about the incident and advised him I had told her everything (women are so smart), so he confessed. Well ladies and Gentlemen, guess what I looked like.. a double betrayer... YUP!!! Molly, being my friend should have asked me if she doubted and not used my name to get a confession out of Frank, but I couldn't be mad, she expected me to come to her and let her know if I knew her man strayed...

Needless to say, Molly and Frank later married and had kids, but Molly and I were NEVER friends again!!

Morale of my story? Next time I won't even acknowledge something wrong is going on!! Not my business, not my problem...



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